CE Focusing Blog

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

By Kathy McGuire, September 30, 2008 11:00 am

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From Creative Edge Focusing: This month’s Getting A Felt Sense Exercise :

The “Intuitive Feel” of Two Different People : “Good” vs. “Uncomfortable” Feeling

DO THIS EXERCISE OVER AND OVER — THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING NEW THAT ARISES, SOMETIMES A MIRACULOUS CHANGE IN PERCEPTION. You’ll find it at the bottom of this e-newsletter.

In this exercise, you are learning to recognize an “intuitive feel” or “bodily felt sense” by having strong bodily responses brought up by different imagery. When you repeat the exercise, with different people behind each door, different “bodily felt senses” or “intuitive feels” arising in response to each person, you will gain more and more experience with, and confidence in, the body’s response as a source of information (and Intuitive Focusing as the method for symbolizing all this preverbal information into useable knowledge!)

You can also have a similar experience of recognizing your body’s response to various events, and the endless information held “preverbally” in this “intuitive feel,” by, for instance:

(1) playing an up-beat and then a slow piece of music, and noticing the difference in the “bodily-feel” of each. This is, of course, the basis of the success of the symphonic form in music, each section calling up a different “mood” or bodily-response. You can practice using Focusing to look for words and images to describe the “intuitive feel” of the two different pieces of music. You will begin to see that the “felt sense” can be an endless source of new verbalizations, new symbolizations about anything that comes to the body’s attention. You could write a poem, create a dance, describe the music to a friend, write your own piece of music, and create many more symbolizations to describe the effect on your body of the two different pieces of music, all from the one “bodily felt-sense.”

(2) Putting your body into a posture or gesture that seems to capture how you feel right now. Then, putting your body into a posture or gesture that captures “How I would like to be feeling.” Pay attention to the “intuitive feel” of each posture, using Focusing to make words or images for the bodily-feel of each posture, with Checking and Resonating until the symbols feel “just right” in capturing the bodily-feel. Now, go back and forth between the two body postures, paying attention to the bodily-feel of each, and see what happens. New words or images, or a new posture, may emerge!

(3) Reading different pieces of poetry, and noticing the “intuitive feel” that arises in your body to each different poem. Use Focusing, with Checking and Resonating, to find some words or an image for the “intuive feel” that comes in response to each different poem.

(4) Looking at pieces of art and, again, noticing the “intuitive feel” of each which arises in the center of your body, and using Intuitive Focusing, with Checking and Resonating, to create words or images to describe your “body’s response” to each different piece of art.

You see that, whenever we create meaning, or articulate the meaning of something to us, we begin by referring to our “bodily felt sense,” our “intuitive feel,” and creating descriptive words or images to capture that “bodily feel.” Meaning is created from The Creative Edge, the non-linear, right-brain, “intuitive feel” that comes in our body when we turn our attention to “pondering” on something.

I am a very kinesthetic person and an NF (iNtuitive Feeler) on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (you’ll find free versions on this test at the link. Please also see my paper,”The Body As A Source Of Knowledge” for an introduction to Thinking and Feeling as ways-of-being in the world). Getting a “bodily felt sense” comes easily to me. I learned Focusing naturally and easily, simply saying, “Thank goodness Eugene Gendlin (Focusing, Bantam, 1981) finally put into words the way I have been living all along.” But others, perhaps less kinesthetic, perhaps Thinkers rather than Feelers on the MBTI, have great difficulty in knowing what it means to “check with your body and see what comes.”

If none of these Getting A Felt Sense exercises are working for you, if you find yourself saying, “I have no idea what she is talking about! I don’t get a ‘bodily feel’ when I listen to music, read poetry, look at art”, then you might want to check into the writings and books about Focusing by Ann Weiser Cornell at www.focusingresources.com . Ann describes herself as someone who had no idea what a “bodily felt sense” was, and she developed her methods of teaching Focusing with a lot of awareness of people with a similar problem.

Pre-Focusing Practice

B. Getting A Felt Sense #1: The “Intuitive Feel” of Each Person
(from Complete Focusing Instructions download at top of page)

Here you are learning the difference between thinking up an answer in your head and the second Step of Intuitive Focusing: Getting A Felt Sense. (download Complete Focusing Instructions above to find this exercise, or follow this link to my blog introducing it)

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

Intuitive Focusing | anxiety, breathing exercise, depression, Empathic Listening, Focusing, Focusing Classes, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, LISTENING, relaxation exercise, self-help skills, stress reduction, support groups

INTUITIVE FOCUSING IS NOT THE SAME AS MEDITATION

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By Kathy McGuire, September 27, 2008 9:41 am

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos Mini-Manual

Focusing, Relaxation, and Meditation

In general, the goal of meditation is to still and clear the constant activity of the mind, to “let go” of controlling thoughts and ego, to rest in a peaceful state of “non-attachment.” With repeated practice, this meditative state of meeting life’s events with “non-attachment” becomes more and more present during the events of everyday living, leading to stress reduction and action from a place of peaceful awareness. Meditation is the OPPOSITE of a problem-solving strategy. Its goal is “emptiness” as a healing state in itself. You can find links to many forms of meditation in blog Week Three: Noticing — Focusing, Relaxation, and Meditation.

Intuitive Focusing IS a problem-solving method. After using meditations like Noticing Your Breathing to “clear a space,” to get to that space of “emptiness,” in Intuitive Focusing, we then turn ourselves toward a more ACTIVE way of engaging and interacting with actual real-life concerns. We ask ourselves an open-ended question, like “What is the feel of this whole thing?”, and then we wait, as long as a minute, for a “felt sense” of an issue or idea to appear in the center of our body. We allow something to arise in that “empty stage” of the body/mind.

However, different from normal intellectual problem-solving, in Focusing, we are not arguing lists of pros and cons. We are finding a way to engage with the “bodily felt sense,” the right-brain “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea, The Creative Edge from which new, non-linear information can unfold. We are engaging in a back-and-forth between this “intuitive feel” and any words, images, or gestures that arise in relation to it. The “body-feel” is the final judge of “rightness.” Through a release of tension, the body tells us, “Yes, that is exactly right. That’s it.”

So, Focusing and meditation are two very different kinds of “Inner Actions,” specific activities we can engage in inside of ourselves.

But we are using meditation as a first step, a way of opening up enough “free attention” in the body for the deeper process of Intuitive Focusing, which involves a more active back-and-forth between the “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea and symbolizations (words, images, gestures) that arise from it.

Relaxation Exercise: Noticing Your Breathing

Here is your relaxation exercise for this month. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible. Or, you can just open this weekly reminder and walk through the exercise online. Relaxing is one way to “clear a space” inside for a longer-term Focusing Problem Solving session.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

relaxation exercises | anxiety, breathing exercise, depression, Empathic Listening, Focusing, Focusing Classes, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, LISTENING, relaxation exercise, self-help skills, stress reduction, support groups

INTUITIVE FOCUSING: A “RECIPE” OF INNER ACTIONS

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

By Kathy McGuire, September 24, 2008 3:08 pm

FREE DOWNLOADS:

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos Mini-Manual

In the First Week of this four weeks practice of Instant “Ahah!” #1: FOCUSING — Find Out What Is Bothering You, I introduced Gendlin’s Six Step Focusing Process and gave the Complete Focusing Exercise. If you are just joining us, go to e-newsletter archive to read this blog before proceeding so you will understand the basic steps of Focusing and prepared to do the practice exercise below.

It may help to view the Six Steps of Focusing just like any “recipe” that you try to follow — in baking a cake, learning to hit a tennis ball, turning on a complicated piece of machinery. Each Step is a specific activity that you do, like “break open the eggs, then separate the whites from the yolks” or “First, pump up the oil, then set the choke, then turn on the ignition.”

You have to know how to do each action before you can carry out the recipe and get to the goal. After you have done the recipe a lot of times, you can go very smoothly and even make your own intuitive adjustments.

But we are not used to “inner actions,” knowing lots of different activities we can carry on inside. So, in learning Focusing, you are learning a set of actions to take inside of yourself:

(1) Clearing A Space: Using a relaxation technique, a guided fantasy, or a formal Taking an Inventory exercise to go from the intellectualization and tension of the day into a more peaceful contact with your body and its wisdom

(2) Getting A Felt Sense: Now, having set aside everything you already know, you ask an Open-Ended Question, like “How am I today?” or “What am I carrying?” , or, if you have chosen a specific issue to work on, “What is this all about?”, AND THEN YOU PAUSE AND WAIT, FOR AS LONG AS A MINUTE, FOR THE VAGUE, PREVERBAL, SUBTLE “BODILY FELT SENSE” OR “INTUITIVE FEEL” OF AN ISSUE OR IDEA TO ARISE.

This “pausing” and paying attention for the preverbal “feel” is a totally new Inner Activity, one that anyone hardly ever does until they learn Intuitive Focusing, and the actual way to access The Creative Edge, the “bodily feel” that is the wellspring of the “new.”

(3) Finding A Handle: In this Inner Activity, you look for words or an image or a gesture that begins to capture the “quality” (“jumpy,” “black,” “a concrete block,” “sad,” “all knotted up,” “joyful,”) of the”felt sense.”

(4) Resonating And Checking: And, in order to find the exactly right symbolizations to capture this new Creative Edge, you have to GO BACK-AND-FORTH BETWEEN ANY SYMBOLS AND THE “INTUITIVE FEEL” UNTIL YOU FIND THE SYMBOLS THAT ARE “EXACTLY RIGHT,” EXPERIENCED AS A PHYSICAL RELEASE OF TENSION, A LARGE OR SMALL “AHAH! THAT IS IT EXACTLY, FROM YOUR BODY.

(4) Asking: Asking open-ended questions of the “intuitive feel” (“And what is so hard about that?” or “And why is this so important to me?” or “And what is the crux of that anger?” and, again, doing the Inner Actions of Steps 2, 3, and 4 :Pausing to get a Felt Sense, looking for Handle words or images, and Resonating and Checking until the body says, through tension release, “Yes, that is exactly it.” The open-ended question allows a new “felt sense” to form in response, during the pause, and further unfolding happens through resonating and checking.

Inner Actions repeated over and over: Asking, PAUSING, looking for Symbolizations, Checking and Resonating whatever comes until the body says “Yes! That is it.”

(5) Receiving: after a “felt shift,” a step of unfolding or “Ahah!,” stopping just for a moment and letting the new realization “sink in.” Pausing to let the new information get “lived into” by your body, taking it in at a cellular level. And appreciating your body, so often ignored and turned away from during the usual day, for sharing its wisdom with you.

And, then, if you like, you can start another cycle of the Inner Actions of Focusing, looking for further unfolding on the issue or idea: Asking, Pausing for Felt Sense, Looking for Handle symbols, Resonating and Checking until the body-sense says, “Yes, that is exactly right.”

You can try out Intuitive Focusing and receive a Listening Response by joining The Creative Edge Practice e-group here.

INSTANT “AHAH!” # 1 Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You

Focusing On the Creative Edge

And here, again, is your practice exercise. Please take time to walk through the Complete Focusing Session in this blog.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

FOCUSING, RELAXATION, AND MEDITATION

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By Kathy McGuire, September 22, 2008 11:42 am

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos

Some people find it easy to drop all their stress and enter into an interior Focusing space. But, many people need easy first steps of practice for “going quietly inside.” And even experienced Focusers get caught up in stress and business and welcome a reminder to take a moment to….pause…..(sigh!)…pay attention to their breathing…….(ahhhhhh!)……and…relax…

While many people use meditation techniques as an end in themselves, a way of healing mind and body, we are using them as a way of “clearing a space” in the body for the specific problem-solving process of Intuitive Focusing.

FREE MEDITATION EXPLANATIONS AND PRACTICE ON THE WEB!

Just “Google” “meditation techniques” and a number of excellent websites offering free explanations and practice exercises will pop up. In general, meditation is a way of escaping from and stilling the endless “go-around” of our thoughts and worries, the endless activity of “the monkey mind.” Our Noticing Your Breathing exercise, as a form of “clearing a space” for Focusing, is similar to this breathing process described at the free Meditation Handbook website, which explains seven basic approaches:

“Another useful method is to lend special awareness to the breathing process felt in the belly. Just behind and below your navel (belly button) lies the hara, which is felt as an ethereal ball of energy. The hara is a natural balancing point of your consciousness which can be thought of as the center of your being. Subjectively and poetically speaking, the hara is where man and universe meet. It is the gateway where we merge and become man-universe and universe-man. No one really knows what the hara actually is, but we can use it to our full advantage. Consciously developing a powerful hara center is the most important secret of meditation.

When your consciousness is centered in the hara instead of the head, your thinking process slows down and you can relax in the expanded world of being. Trying to stop distracting thoughts through will power alone leads to more thoughts and a self-defeating inner struggle. By transferring your center of awareness to the hara, thoughts gradually disappear on their own without inner conflict. That is why you see Buddha statues with a big belly. It is an esoteric message that the hara is the key to meditation.

Sit quietly and focus on your belly as it moves in and out as you breathe. Over time the hara point will become more noticeable as your meditation grows stronger. Sudden emergencies, such as near collisions on the highway, tend to activate the hara center. We often get a “gut reaction” from sudden danger. You can nourish the feeling of the hara by simply paying passive attention to it. This relaxed concentration is very close to doing nothing, yet it is still a subtle effort. Drinking herb tea or hot water before meditation sessions relaxes the gut and facilitates awareness of the hara. Overeating and consuming cold drinks tends to make hara awareness more difficult.”

The bolding is mine, showing how this meditation practice is seen as strengthening your ability to notice “gut feelings,” “intuitions,” a great companion to Intuitive Focusing.

If you are really intrigued, you can go to Free Meditations website and find several different versions of a Buddhist breath meditation and many, many more meditation techniques.

And, last but not least, at The Meditation Society website, you can find links to 108 different meditations on the web!

But we are using meditation as a first step, a way of opening up enough “free attention” in the body for the deeper process of Intuitive Focusing, which involves a more active back-and-forth between the “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea and symbolizations (words, images, gestures) that arise from it.

Print and Practice!!!!!

Here is your relaxation exercise for this month. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible.

If you order our Self-Help Package, , you can listen on audio CD Intuitive Focusing: Disk one, Track 2, with Dr, McGuire’s peaceful voice to keep you company — and help you stay on track!!

PRE-FOCUSING PRACTICE
A. RELAXATION SUGGESTIONS (from Complete Focusing Instructions, which you can download from the link at the top of this blog)

The quiet time between instructions is an important time for just breathing—and relaxing.

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

1. Noticing-Allow 10-15 minutes

Lie down and make yourself comfortable—Loosen any clothing that is too tight—
Massage your own neck and face, making small circles with your fingertips over small areas at a time—Find at least five different spots on your neck and five on your face to massage in this way— Feel the tension leaving—
1 minute
Stretch your whole body three times, reaching your arms out over your head, arching your back, and pointing your toes— After each stretch, collapse into the floor and breath deeply, relaxing—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax
10 seconds
Now, lie there and notice your breathing. Don’t try to change it,just notice the breath going in and out—in—and out—in—and out—in—and out
10 seconds
Now, begin to notice any thoughts or pictures you are having. JUST NOTICE THEM—and keep breathing, in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just notice your thoughts going by, like a movie—don’t think or problem solve—just notice—and keep breathing, in—and out—in and out—
1 minute
If you realize that you have started thinking about something and are trying to solve a problem or have started worrying about something, just allow yourself to leave that thought and to come back to noticing your breathing, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
If you have started thinking and problem solving, just leave that thought—and come back to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just noticing your thoughts, like a movie, letting them go, returning to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out
3 minutes
Now, massage any parts of your body that seem tense or uncomfortable—
1 minute
Stretch one more time, and get up when you are ready.

Free Resources

Want to share your experience, do Focusing online and get an actual Listening Response, ask questions? Join The Creative Edge Practive yahoo e-support group.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Intuitive Focusing | anxiety, breathing exercise, depression, Empathic Listening, Focusing, Focusing Classes, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, LISTENING, meditation, relaxation exercise, self-help skills, stress reduction, support groups

FOCUSING AND ANXIETY

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

By Kathy McGuire, September 19, 2008 11:49 am

Download Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

In the First Week of this four weeks practice of Instant “Ahah!” #1: FOCUSING — Find Out What Is Bothering You, I introduced Gendlin’s Six Step Focusing Process and gave the Complete Focusing Exercise. If you are just joining us, go to blog Complete Focusing Session before proceeding so you will understand the basic steps of Focusing and prepared to do the practice exercise below.

In my personal/work life, I am caught up in a situation generating a lot of anxiety. I often use the Relaxation: Noticing Your Breathing exercise to help break through the wall of anxiety so that I can fall asleep or, at other times, to “Clear A Space” for a deeper Focusing Turn.

I also sometimes add the basic energy meridian tapping sequence from Emotional Freedom Techniques (www.emofree.com ), another free self-help method which often allows the deep sighs and tension release of the relaxation response.

And, really most successfully, I turn to The Creative Edge Practice E-Group — just knowing there are Listeners out there in cyberspace usually allows me to shift immediately from overwhelming anxiety to relieving tears, even sobbing, about the deeper fears and issues underlying the anxiety. As actual research with brain waves and galvanic skin response (GSR) has shown, simply using Focusing to find a “name,” to find words and images for what the body is carrying subconsciously, actually brings about relaxation. It is better to know what you are facing, even if the words seem bad to others!

Here is a recent example of a Focusing Turn on “Debilitating Anxiety” which I did on The Creative Edge Practice E-Group, getting a lot of “felt shifting” and release of my anxiety (and the ability to sleep for two nights after the Turn) as well as, in a few hours, several comforting, empathic Listening Responses from group members throughout the world. I include only a small part of the Turn, demonstrating the initial shift from “free-floating anxiety” to relieving tears and sobbing as words come as a “Handle” on the felt sense:

Hello, Group,

I am suffering from “debilitating anxiety,” frozen neck and shoulders and jaw, sleeplessness or restless sleeping. I am reaching out to your friendly comfort in hopes of “touching” the edge of this anxiety, and allowing it to unfold its message. I find anxiety especially difficult to “disidentify from”, when trying to do Focusing alone, so I reach for your compassion — just knowing you are out there usually helps!

So, I am stopping to “sense in,” to try to stand at the edge of this anxiety, instead of being paralyzed inside of it — I imagine I will do some Clearing A Space, naming the various issues I am carrying, seeing which wants attention — or perhaps not! We’ll see what happens in this non-linear Focusing process! But, first, just turning toward my body with some noticing of my breathing as a way to come into my body, and with the general Focusing question, “What is this ‘anxiety’ all about?” —

(eyes closed, sigh, breathing—) Words come up almost immediately, with tears (and the words completely surprise me!): “I feel so alone. I am so lonely.” (sobbing comes, as I ask myself, “What is this lonely?” and wait for the fuller “felt sense” of “it all” to come —so I am asking, “What is this sobbing about lonely, and related somehow to anxiety? (still surprised at the words) (more sobbing, don’t know “why”) —anxiety is somehow related to “feeling so lonely” — “What is ‘all of this’?” and Focusing on the “feel of it all” —

Some thinking comes: “Perhaps it is the sense of ‘battle’ involved in a lot of work and family things on my plate — the “uphill struggle” so commonly created around herself by an 8 on the Enneagram: The Challenger — hostility all around — so, I will stop and do Focusing, sensing into what comes in the ‘center of my body’ in response to this ‘guess’ —

(deep breath, quiet pause for inner ‘reflection’) —(shoulders go up and down in spasm of “fear” — so I decided to “accentuate,” to repeat this body motion, see if something comes as a “felt sense,” larger “feel” of “all of that fear in my shoulders) — (lots of sobbing comes as I repeat this “spasm of fear” and the words, again, “I feel so alone; I am so alone” (“What is this ‘alone’?, I ask myself. These words still surprise me) —

(long pause for Focusing on the “feel of it all”)— Words: “It seems, or perhaps, it is that I am seeing negative possibilities in areas where other people don’t want to think about them or hear about them, and this leaves me alone with my fears, perhaps” — knowing this is just a “guess,” again, I will stop and “resonate” these words against the “bodily felt sense” that is MORE than any of these words — “Is it that?”, I ask, and wait quietly, reflecting inward, and see what comes —–

(big sigh, breath, and another) — (moving my head back and forth on my neck rapidly, trying to break through this tension) —(big breath) — (shoulders spasming again) —

“And isn’t this what I always do, catastrophize, intuit the worst that can happen — and sometimes I am right, sometimes wrong (and these new words come) — but always I am prepared! I am prepared for the worst! Prepared for the battle, the disillusionment, the failure —- (big sigh)

This is just the beginning, but you can see how quickly the even distant presence of Listening Others helped me to “relate to” the anxiety, instead of being frozen inside it, and allowed new steps of forward motion, of intuitive problem solving to arise.

You can explore joining The Creative Edge Practice e-group here.

INSTANT “AHAH!” # 1 Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You

Focusing On the Creative Edge

And here, again, is your practice exercise. Please take time to walk through the Complete Focusing Session as I did in the example above. You will find it in this blog, along with the opportunity to download the Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual in English or Spanish.

Free Resources

Want to share your experience, do Focusing online and get an actual Listening Response, ask questions? Join The Creative Edge Practive yahoo e-support group.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Pre-Focusing Practice: The Felt Sense of Two Different People

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By Kathy McGuire, September 18, 2008 1:45 pm

Download Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

GETTING A “FELT SENSE,” AN “INTUITIVE FEEL”

Gendlin’s Focusing (Bantam, 1981, 1984), and my Intuitive Focusing, is a procedure for going back-and-forth between the bodily-feel of an issue or idea or creative project and words/images/gestures until symbolizations are found which are “just right” in capturing this “intuitive feel” of “the whole thing. In this series of blogs, I am teaching you the six steps of the Focusing process (see blog Complete Focusing Session for a sample Focusing Session).

In the first Step of Focusing, you “Clear A Space” with relaxation or other exercises, setting aside already-known intellectualizations and coming in touch with your body. See Relaxation #1 Noticing for a sample relaxation exercise.

In the second Step of Focusing, Getting A Felt Sense, you wait quietly, for as much as a minute, for a subtle “feel” of the whole thing, an “intuition,” to form in the center of your body. Then, you create words or images that are just right to capture it. You are looking for the “intuitive feel,” the Creative Edge, the right-brain information that is more than you can put into words. Gendlin (Focusing, Bantam, 1981, 1984) calls it “the felt sense” of the whole thing.

In this Pre-Focusing Practice exercise, I try to give you guided imagery that will evoke some strong, hard-to-miss bodily “felt senses.”

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

1. The “Intuitive Feel” of Each Person-Allow 10 minutes
(Joan Klagsbrun invented this exercise)

I’m going to invite you to imagine two doors. Behind the first will be someone that you feel good about. Behind the second will be someone who upsets you.

You will notice that you have a different experience of each person in the center of your body, around the chest and heart area. This experience, this “intuitive feel” without words, is the Creative Edge.

Although initially this experience comes as an “intuition,” or a “feeling,” without words, by paying attention to this “intuitive feel,” you can create many new words and images, truly innovative ideas.

—Close your eyes and get comfortable—loosen any clothing that is too tight—
1 minute
—Just follow your breathing for a little while, noticing the breath going in—and out—
1 minute
—Now take a few moments to think about who the two people will be, one that you feel good about, one who upsets you.
1 minute
—And think about the kind of door you’ll put each behind, the decorations, color — 30 seconds

—Now, imagine yourself walking up to the first door and opening it—Here is the person that you feel good about—10 seconds

—Let yourself notice the “feel” of that person in your body—10 seconds

—Find some words or an image to describe it—30 seconds

—Next, bid that person “Goodbye,” close the door, and walk away—10 seconds

—Now, imagine yourself walking up to the other door and opening it—Here is the person who upsets you—10 seconds

—Again, notice the “experience” of that person in the center of your body, the “intuitive feel—10 seconds

—Find some words or an image to describe it—30 seconds

—Next, bid that person “Goodbye,” close the door, and walk away—10 seconds

—Now, spend a few moments comparing the two “felt senses,” the good feelings and the uncomfortable feelings — 30 seconds

—These are the “bodily felt senses,” the “intuitive feel” you have, of the two people involved. They are more than you could ever put into words, but you can make many words and images from them—30 seconds

— Spend as long as you wish exploring these two experiences, going back and forth between the two “intuitive feels” and looking for words or images to describe the difference—
3 minutes
—And when you are ready, slowly bring your attention back into the room.

DOWNLOAD COMPLETE FOCUSING INSTRUCTIONS MANUAL FROM LINK AT TOP OF THIS BLOG

Remember, it can be much easier to learn Intuitive Focusing in the company of a Focused Listener. You can learn all about Focusing Listening, and find resources, at the website for Creative Edge Focusing (TM), www.cefocusing.com . And you will find additional Complete Focusing Instructions, for personal growth, creativity, and spirituality, in the Instant “Ahah!”s Mini-Manual, available along with newsletter subscription.

If you subscribe to our e-newsletter, you will receive three exercises a week by email to help you learn and practice Listening and Focusing at home and work.

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

INTUITIVE FOCUSING SKILL: PRACTICE EXAMPLE

Comments (1)

By Kathy McGuire, September 15, 2008 1:38 pm

EXAMPLE OF A COMPLETE FOCUSING TURN

In the First Week of this four weeks practice of Instant "Ahah!" #1: FOCUSING --- Find Out What Is Bothering You, I introduced Gendlin's Six Step Focusing Process and gave the Complete Focusing Exercise. If you are just joining us, go to blog Intuitive Focusing to read this e-newsletter before proceeding to read the example of a Focusing Turn below:

I did a Focusing Turn in The Creative Edge Practice E-Group (join here)  on a felt experience which I call "Experiencing The Sacred":

// Note: Listening/Focusing does not have to be used in relation to spiritual experience -- this is just a special interest of mine, and not central to Gendlin's Focusing process and the use of The Creative Edge Pyramid of skills and applications at home and at work---//

Step One: Clearing A Space

(closing my eyes, turning inward---slowing down, paying attention to my breathing) --- Breathing in --- and out---- in---and out--- Massaging my face, neck shoulders. Taking a minute or two to come in touch with my body.

Step Two: Getting A Felt Sense

Now I start looking for the "intuitive feel" to form for the Focusing question: "What is this 'whole thing' about Experiencing The Sacred)------

------(Focusing inward at least a minute, waiting for the "felt sense," the "intuitive feel" of "this whole thing" to form, as a vague, preverbal sensing inside my chest area---)

Step Three: Finding A Handle

Initial words come: "Someone asked me why I have used religious or spiritual  terms, like Agape, the Christ-within-the-Other, the Universal Oneness, in pointing to the Sacred experience that I often have during Listening/Focusing turns, especially when the Focuser touches upon a "sheen of tears," a place of profound meaning (see my article "Being Touched and Being Moved"), and I am the Listener, and, suddenly, the boundary between us dissolves and I feel that"our souls are touching" or some such thing---hard to find words to describe it---I am pointing

Step Four: Checking and Resonating

(quiet to check with the "felt sense," the "intuitive feel" of this "whole thing"--- "Do those words fit? 'Our souls are touching, boundary dissolves'?" (sitting quietly with "the feel of it all," going back-and-forth between words and images or gestures which arise, checking and resonating, trying to find the symbolizations that are "just right" in capturing "the feel of it all")---

---The person and I spoke of Martin Buber's "I -Thou" vs. "I-It" distinction as another way of pointing to this experience---(pause to look for words--- new words) this experience of merging-without-joining, union-with-separation, and, not just the two people, but the sense of "something more" in that moment of "soul-touching (soul is not the right word, just a pointing word)"---the sense that The Sacred (again, pointing words---) enters in---the two people hanging together in this larger

---(I'm getting a thrill here, a little teary---almost goose bumps)------(big breath---ahhhhhh!)

(new steps forward, "felt shifts" coming as I find words that are closer in grasping and articulating the "felt meaning" -- the Ahhh!, sighs, deep breaths that indicate the tension release and "Ahah!" experience of the "felt shift," the Paradigm Shift)

Step Five: Asking An Open-Ended Question

(and I ask myself, "What is so important about this 'two people hanging together in this larger Something'?" and wait quietly for the "feel of it all" to emerge, preverbally in my body, Getting The Felt Sense, before I again begin looking for Handle Words and Resonating and Checking---pause for "felt sensing", as much as a minute, followed by more symbolizations, more resonating and checking between the symbols and the "feel of it all")

--- and the words "Well, that is the point---it is that experience that I call Experiencing The Sacred---that sense that something else enters into the "energy" (just a pointing word) space between us------(breath---sigh---a little teary as in "touched and moved"------(big sigh---)

Step Six: Receiving

(and I sit with and savor this new insight, that it is exactly the two people and Something More in the space between that feels Sacred, touches me so deeply, and some Global Application comes after the Felt Shift --- seeing new connections)

--- And it can happen in nature, with a sunset, with music, in churches or other sacred spaces, many different roads, not just between people--- (and I spend some time just letting the richness of the felt shift, the new information, register throughout my body/mind, and thanking my body-sense for this new information). End of Focusing Turn

FELT SHIFTING, GIVING BIRTH TO THE NEW

You can see how, instead of answering immediately from my head, what I already know about "experiencing the Sacred" ("Well, of course, it's related to Martin Buber and it's about Something Greater Than Yourself," etc.), Focusing allows me to stop and "sit with" my larger "whole-body-wisdom" that includes everything I have read and everything I have experienced and am experiencing.

From this "felt sense" I can articulate new facets of the experience. And I also experience the sense of "sureness," of experiential rather than merely intellectual insight, that lets me know I am on the right track.  Of course, Focusing can be used for all kinds of problem solving without entry into the spiritual realm, without touching on tears and feeling connection with the Other---this Experiencing the Sacred is just a special Interest Area of mine-

Subscribe To E-Course For Weekly Practice Exercises

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director Creative Edge Focusing (TM)www.cefocusing.com

Intuitive Focusing | anxiety, being touched and being moved, depression, Empathic Listening, focusing exercise, Focusing skill, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, relaxation, self-help, stress reduction, support groups, tears

PRE-FOCUSING PRACTICE: #1 RELAXATION: NOTICING YOUR BREATHING

Comments (2)

By Kathy McGuire, September 6, 2008 1:58 pm

From Creative Edge Focusing: This week’s Relaxation Exercise

Print and Practice!!!!!

Here is your relaxation exercise for this week, which we will actually practice for four weeks until it becomes natural to you. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible. Relaxing is one way to “clear a space” inside for a longer-term Focusing Problem Solving session (see blog Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You for a complete introduction to Focusing) .

You will also find this in the Complete Focusing Instructions download at Creative Edge Focusing, p.3: Pre-Focusing Practice A. Relaxation Suggestions #1: Noticing. You get it by joining our e-support group for further support in practicing Listening and Focusing.

And, if you order our Self-Help Package, you can listen on audio CD Intuitive Focusing: Disk one, Track 2, with Dr, McGuire’s peaceful voice to keep you company — and help you stay on track!!

PRE-FOCUSING PRACTICE

A. RELAXATION SUGGESTIONS (from Complete Focusing Instructions)

Use a gentle, slowly-paced voice, leaving time as suggested between parts of the instruction (time those 1 minute pauses — they are way longer than you can imagine!). The quiet time between instructions is an important time for just breathing—and relaxing.

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

I turn to this simple relaxation exercise when I am having trouble sleeping or am otherwise overwhelmed with stress, anxiety, tension. It is a great first step to a more lengthy Complete Focusing session.

1. Noticing-Allow 10-15 minutes

Lie down and make yourself comfortable—Loosen any clothing that is too tight—
Massage your own neck and face, making small circles with your fingertips over small areas at a time—Find at least five different spots on your neck and five on your face to massage in this way— Feel the tension leaving—
1 minute
Stretch your whole body three times, reaching your arms out over your head, arching your back, and pointing your toes— After each stretch, collapse into the floor and breath deeply, relaxing—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax
10 seconds
Now, lie there and notice your breathing. Don’t try to change it,just notice the breath going in and out—in—and out—in—and out—in—and out
10 seconds
Now, begin to notice any thoughts or pictures you are having. JUST NOTICE THEM—and keep breathing, in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just notice your thoughts going by, like a movie—don’t think or problem solve—just notice—and keep breathing, in—and out—in and out—
1 minute
If you realize that you have started thinking about something and are trying to solve a problem or have started worrying about something, just allow yourself to leave that thought and to come back to noticing your breathing, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
If you have started thinking and problem solving, just leave that thought—and come back to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just noticing your thoughts, like a movie, letting them go, returning to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out
3 minutes
Now, massage any parts of your body that seem tense or uncomfortable—
1 minute
Stretch one more time, and get up when you are ready.

Subscribe To E-Course For Weekly Practice Exercises

If you subscribe to our e-newsletter, you will receive three exercises a week by email to help you learn and practice Listening and Focusing at home and work.

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Intuitive Focusing, self-help skills | breathing exercise, Empathic Listening, Focusing, Focusing Classes, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, LISTENING, relaxation exercise, self-help skills, stress reduction, support groups

ESTUDIO DE CASOS Y TESTIMONIOS

By Kathy McGuire, November 29, 2007 1:11 pm

Focusing – Individualmente, con un Entrenador de Borde Creativo o con un Terapeuta de Focusing Experiencial.

Cualquiera que sabe que Focusing Intuitivo es lo básico del Proceso de Solución de Problemas PRISMAS/S, puede usarlo en cualquier momento para dar un nuevo paso seguro, desde la tensión o confusión hasta la solución del problema. Este será un nuevo “¡Ajá!”. Físicamente experimentado en su totalidad por el cuerpo, el cual asiente y relaja la tensión diciendo: “¡Sí, eso es exactamente! “, “¡Ahora puedo actuar!”

En mi ejemplo de abajo, primero uso Focusing Intuitivo por mi cuenta, luego, generalmente, contrato la ayuda de un Escuchador Focalizado, en este caso, mi esposo. Tengo la suerte de tener un esposo entrenado pero con él, me gusta compartir un turno igual de escucha.

Ejemplo del Caso:

Por varias semanas he estado dándole vueltas a un problema relacionado con el trabajo; he estado tensa, bloqueada, con noches sin dormir, obsesiva. Estoy preocupada por que si tomo alguna acción me pueden demandar, pero no quiero echarme para atrás.

He estado dando algunos pasos y gastando dinero tratando de protegerme legalmente. Pero la tensión, el insomnio y la obsesión continúan. Me encuentro a mí misma imaginándome cómo voy a defenderme en la Corte. Avanzo con esfuerzo, pero el costo es muy alto. Todo el proyecto se ha vuelto agotador.

Finalmente, después de semanas me doy cuenta que debo sentarme en silencio y usar Focusing Intuitivo acerca del asunto. Entonces, cierro mis ojos y sigo mi respiración por un momento a manera de relajación para llegar a un “espacio claro” y silencioso adentro— Suspiro…, dejo salir un poco la tensión…me pregunto: “Realmente ¿de qué se trata todo esto?…” Espero silenciosamente que algo nuevo aparezca…, un sentir intuitivo… o un Borde Creativo…para mí…, este Borde Creativo generalmente viene no a mi cabeza sino al centro de mi cuerpo…, alrededor de mi corazón…, a la cavidad del pecho…

Cuando viene un “sentir intuitivo” busco silenciosamente unas palabras o una imagen que comiencen a asirlo. “No quiero dar mi brazo a torcer…”, “No quiero ser derrotada…” (Hay un sentimiento con lágrimas aquí) “Tengo el derecho de hacerlo…” Respiro un poco más, revisando estas palabras frente a este “sentir intuitivo”…suspiro…dejo salir un poco de tensión.

En respuesta a estas palabras, viene un nuevo “sentir intuitivo” al centro de mi cuerpo, cerca del área del pecho…le presto atención, buscando palabras o una imagen que pudiera capturarlo…No puedo seguir así. Es demasiada tensión…Me siento en silencio manteniendo estas palabras frente al Borde Creativo, el “sentir intuitivo…”

Al usar el Paso de Preguntar de Focusing Intuitivo, se me viene la pregunta: “¿Qué puedo hacer para hacer que esto tenga menos tensión…?”…Permanezco con esta pregunta, prestándole atención al centro de mi cuerpo… y en lugar de contestar desde mi cabeza…, desde lo ya conocido…, espero que se forme un “sentir intuitivo” de una respuesta…Cuidadosamente busco palabras o imágenes que capturen el sentir intuitivo…suspiro, relajando la tensión.

En respuesta, consigo unas palabras, las cuales se sienten como un nuevo”Ajá” “¡Oh!, se trata de esta pequeña parte del proyecto…No tengo que renunciar a todo lo demás…, tal vez solamente a esa pequeña parte para reducir la tensión…

Reviso estas palabras frente al “sentir intuitivo”… Sí, ¡hay una relajación allí!

Estoy sacudiendo mi cabeza: “¡Sí!, ¡eso es!”… “¡eso relajaría la tensión!”, “¡el miedo!…”

Me siento emocionada aquí. Es difícil concentrarse. Quiero levantarme y caminar ansiosamente… ¡no puedo hacer Focusing por mucho tiempo! Le pregunto a mi esposo que está entrenado en Escucha Focalizada si él estaría disponible; sí, él será mi Escuchador Focalizado mientras yo continúo este proceso de Focusing Intuitivo. Nos tomará de 10 a 20 minutos. ¡A él le gusta hacerlo!…

Cierro los ojos y permanezco en este nuevo lugar, “Es solamente acerca de este pequeño lugar…” suspiro relajando la tensión…

Mi esposo refleja: “Así que es realmente sólo esta pequeña parte que tienes que cambiar. No tienes que dejar todo…sólo esa parte…”

Estoy asintiendo otra vez, todo mi cuerpo dice: “¡Sí!, puedo hacer eso realmente…,” “sí…, me libraré de ese miedo, esa tensión agotadora!…” Continúo revisando esa posible solución frente al “sentir intuitivo” y todo mi cuerpo sigue diciendo, “Sí, todo eso está bien conmigo. Puedo hacerlo sin sentirme derrotada”.

Mi esposo refleja: “Así que estás revisando y todo tu cuerpo te dice: “Sí eso podría estar bien”…. “Puedo hacer eso sin sentirme derrotada”. Sigo asintiendo, “Sí, eso podría estar bien…” suspiro…, relajando la tensión…

Seguimos por un rato, yo ahora en la modalidad de resolver problemas, intentando posibles opciones nuevas y diferentes; continúo revisando con el “sentir intuitivo”, El Borde Creativo: “¿Está esto realmente bien?”… “¿Seré capaz de dormir en la noche si hago esto?…” Mi esposo continúa usando Escucha Focalizada para reflejar lo que yo digo,…dejándome revisar y aclarar…

Finalmente decido mantener esa pequeña parte ahora, siempre y cuando me prepare a mí misma para dejarla si es que tengo la necesidad de hacerlo....Esto parece ser una buena solución (Estoy moviendo la cabeza asintiendo y suspirando, relajando la tensión, es la manera que tiene mi cuerpo de decir: “¡Sí!, ¡esto realmente encajó…!” “… ¡Tú puedes hacer esto realmente…!” Seguidamente, terminamos el turno de Escucha/Focusing de manera formal.

En los próximos días, tengo menos tensión. En las noches siguientes puedo dormir, surgen nuevas ideas, alternativas para reemplazar esa pequeña parte, etc. Tengo nueva energía para seguir adelante con todo el proyecto. La posibilidad de “pequeños cambios” me da también la oportunidad de permitir que entren otras personas en mi proyecto sin que me asalte toda esa ansiedad y miedo que me han mantenido aislada, incapaz de compartir mis ideas con otras personas.

Si su meta es solamente utilizar Focusing para Ud. mismo, puede tomar una clase o un taller de entrenamiento en Focusing de un profesional de Focusing que Ud. puede encontrar en nuestra sección de Recursos Gratis.

Si desea ayuda de Escucha Focalizada de manera consistente y sin tener que devolver el servicio como Escuchador (que es lo que sucede en las Parejas de Focusing como mencionamos mas abajo), entonces Ud. puede contratar un Entrenador de Focusing de Borde Creativo o un Terapeuta de Focusing Experiencial (Ver listados en la sección de Recursos Gratis).

Si Ud. ya tiene una relación de Entrenamiento, puede concertar una cita para Escucha Focalizada por teléfono; a menudo, podría ya comenzar a Focalizar simplemente escribiendo un correo a su Entrenador expresándole acerca de su asunto o preocupación, poniendo atención a su interior, usando respuestas de Focusing Intuitivo. El Entrenador puede enviarle un correo de vuelta con respuestas de Escucha Focalizada. ¡De esta manera Ud. recibe ayuda instantánea a mitad de precio!

Este material es ofrecido solamente como destrezas de autoayuda. Al proveerlos, la Dra. McGuire no se compromete en rendir servicios psicológicos, financieros, legales u otros servicios profesionales. Si se necesita la asistencia de un experto o de un consejero, se debe buscar los servicios de un profesional competente.

TESTIMONIO

“Siempre que hago Focusing, estoy sorprendida de ver cuán rápido surge el asunto, y cómo, con la ayuda de un Escuchador, hay una transformación que va desde la confusión hacia la comprensión y finalmente la solución.”

( Profesional asociado con una organización sin fines de lucro).

Translation by Agnes Rodriguez, Certified Focusing Professional and Creative Edge Associate offering Listening and Focusing training by phone in English and Spanish. See Agnes Rodriguez.

See also The Focusing Institute for articles in Spanish by Eugene Gendlin, creator of Focusing, and Spanish-speaking Focusing Teachers world-wide.

Dr. Kathy McGuire

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Business, core skills, health, Intuitive Focusing, LISTENING, self-help skills, spanish translations | Focused Listening, Focusing, Focusing en espanol, Gendlin, Intuitive Focusing, peer counseling, problem solving, self-help, stress reduction

FOCUSING AND WORK: STRESS REDUCTION = FINDING WORDS

By Kathy McGuire, November 27, 2007 7:25 pm

In the example below, taken from the Case Studies area at Creative Edge Focusing (TM), the Focuser goes from unspecified, work-related anxiety and sleeplessness to being able to name the problem and begin problem solving, using Intuitive Focusing:

1. Focusing — Alone Or With A Creative Edge Coach or Experiential Focusing Therapist

Anyone who knows Intuitive Focusing, as the core of the PRISMS/S Problem Solving Process, can use it any time to go from confusion and tension to an absolute sureness of a next step of problem resolution. This will be a physically experienced “Ahah!”, indicated by the whole body nodding and releasing tension, saying “Yes, this is exactly it! I can act now.”

In my example below, first I use Intuitive Focusing on my own, then, at a certain point, I contract for Focused Listening help from another, my husband in this case. I’m lucky enough to have a trained husband (I trained him!), but, with him, eventually I will want to give equal time:

Case Example:

For several weeks I have been stewing about a work-related problem, stymied, tense, sleepless nights, obsessing. I am concerned that I might be sued if I take a certain action, yet I don’t want to back down. I have even taken steps and spent money to try to protect myself legally. Yet the tension, sleeplessness, obsessing continue. I find myself imagining how I would defend myself in court. I forge ahead, but the emotional cost is very high. The whole project has become draining.

Finally, after weeks, I have the sense to sit down quietly and actively use Intuitive Focusing on the issue. I close my eyes and follow my breathing for a while as a way of relaxing and coming to a quiet, “clear space” inside……I sigh, let go of some tension…..I ask myself, “What is this all about, really?”….I wait quietly for something new, an “intuitive feel” or Creative Edge to come…for me, this Creative Edge usually comes in the center of my body (not my head!), around my heart, chest cavity…..

When an “intuitive feel” comes, I quietly look for some words or an image which begin to grasp it: “I don’t want to give up….I don’t want to be beaten (there is a teary feeling here)….I have a right to do this”…..I breath some more, checking these words against the “intuitive feel”……I sigh, release some tension……

A new “intuitive feel” comes in the center of my body, around the chest area, in response to these words….I pay attention to it, looking for words or an image that might capture it…….”I can’t go on like this. It is too stressful….”….I sit quietly, holding these words against The Creative Edge, the “intuitive feel”…..

I use the Asking Step of Intuitive Focusing and a question comes: “What can I do to make this less stressful?”….I sit with this question, paying attention in the center of my body…instead of answering from my head, the already-known, I wait for an “intuitive feel” of an answer to form …….I carefully look for words or images to capture the intuitive feel……..I sigh, releasing tension…

I get words in answer which feel like a new “Ahah!”: “Oh, it’s really just about this one small part of the project…….I don’t have to give up everything else, but maybe just that one small part, to reduce the tension”….I check these words against the “intuitive feel”….there is an easing there. I am nodding my head: “Yes, that is really it…That would release the tension, the fear…..”

I get sort of excited here. It’s hard to concentrate. I want to get up and walk anxiously around….I’m not good at doing Focusing alone for very long. I ask my husband, who is trained in Focused Listening and available, if he will be a Focused Listener while I continue this Intuitive Focusing process. It will take 10-20 minutes. He is willing to do this……

I close my eyes and sense into this new place, “It’s really only about this small part”…..I sigh, releasing tension….My husband reflects: “So it’s really only that small part you have to change. You don’t have to give up the whole thing….Just that part.”……

I’m nodding again, my whole body saying, “Yes, I can really do that if it will get rid of this fear, this draining tension”…..I continue checking this possible solution against the “intuitive feel,” and my whole body keeps saying, “Yes, that much is okay with me. I can do that without feeling beaten.” My husband reflects, “So you are checking, and your whole body says, ‘Yes, that would be okay. I could do that…without feeling beaten’”…….I keep nodding, “Yes, that would be okay.”…I sigh, releasing tension….

We go on for a while, me in problem solving mode now, trying out possible different new choices, continuing to check with the “intuitive feel,” The Creative Edge: “Is this really okay?…Will I be able to sleep at night if I do this?” My husband continues using Focused Listening to reflect what I say, letting me check and clarify….

I finally decide a way that I can keep even that small part now, as long as I prepare myself to give it up later if I have to ……..This seems a good solution (I’m nodding and sighing, releasing tension, my body’s way of saying, “Yes, this really fits. You can really do this.”). We end the formal Listening/Focusing turn.

Throughout the next few days, I have less tension. I can sleep at night. New ideas keep popping up: possible replacements for that “one small part,” etc. I have new energy to move ahead with the whole project. This “small change” possibility also gives me a way to let other people in on my project, without raising the whole anxiety and fear issue, which had been keeping me isolated, unable to share my ideas with other people.

If your goal is only to use Focusing by yourself, you can take a Focusing Training class or workshop from a Focusing Professional found in our Free Resources section.

If you want consistent Focused Listening help, without reciprocating as a Listener in a Focusing Partnership as below, then you can hire a Creative Edge Focusing Coach or an Experiential Focusing Therapist (See Listings in Free Resources Section) as a consistent Focused Listener.

If you have a Coaching relationship, you can arrange for Focused Listening by phone, but you can often start Focusing simply by starting to write an email to your Coach on the issue or concern, paying attention inside, using Intuitive Focusing…then, the Coach can send an email back, with Focused Listening responses. This will give you instant help at half the cost!

Email Dr. McGuire to explore Focusing Coaching or Focusing Partnership phone sessions or to set up a free 20-minute Trial Session. You can explore options and prices in The Store

See our website for many descriptions and exercises for learning Intuitive Focusing and Focused Listening, to subscribe to our free e-course/e-newsletter, and to join our online Creative Edge Practice yahoo group for free, supervised practice of actual listening/focusing skills.

Dr. Kathy McGuire

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)