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By Kathy McGuire, September 27, 2008 9:41 am

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos Mini-Manual 

Focusing, Relaxation, and Meditation

In general, the goal of meditation is to still and clear the constant activity of the mind, to “let go” of controlling thoughts and ego, to rest in a peaceful state of “non-attachment.” With repeated practice, this meditative state of meeting life’s events with “non-attachment” becomes more and more present during the events of everyday living, leading to stress reduction and action from a place of peaceful awareness. Meditation is the OPPOSITE of a problem-solving strategy. Its goal is “emptiness” as a healing state in itself. You can find links to many forms of meditation in blog  Week Three: Noticing — Focusing, Relaxation, and Meditation.
 
Intuitive Focusing IS a problem-solving method. After using meditations like Noticing Your Breathing to “clear a space,” to get to that space of “emptiness,”  in Intuitive Focusing, we then turn ourselves toward a more ACTIVE way of engaging and interacting with actual real-life concerns.  We ask ourselves an open-ended question, like “What is the feel of this whole thing?”, and then we wait, as long as a minute, for a “felt sense” of an issue or idea to appear in the center of our body. We allow something to arise in that “empty stage” of the body/mind.
 
However, different from normal intellectual problem-solving, in Focusing, we are not arguing lists of pros and cons. We are finding a way to engage with the “bodily felt sense,” the right-brain “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea, The Creative Edge from which new, non-linear information can unfold. We are engaging in a back-and-forth between this “intuitive feel” and any words, images, or gestures that arise in relation to it. The “body-feel” is the final judge of “rightness.” Through a release of tension, the body tells us, “Yes, that is exactly right. That’s it.”
 
So, Focusing and meditation are two very different kinds of “Inner Actions,” specific activities we can engage in inside of ourselves.
 
But we are using meditation as a first step, a way of opening up enough “free attention” in the body for the deeper process of Intuitive Focusing, which involves a more active back-and-forth between the “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea and symbolizations (words, images, gestures) that arise from it.

Relaxation Exercise: Noticing Your Breathing

 Here is your relaxation exercise for this month. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible. Or, you can just open this weekly reminder and walk through the exercise online. Relaxing is one way to “clear a space” inside for a longer-term Focusing Problem Solving session.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

 See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Comments (0)

By Kathy McGuire, September 24, 2008 3:08 pm

FREE DOWNLOADS:

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos Mini-Manual

 In the First Week of this four weeks practice of Instant “Ahah!” #1: FOCUSING — Find Out What Is Bothering You, I introduced Gendlin’s Six Step Focusing Process and gave the Complete Focusing Exercise. If you are just joining us, go to e-newsletter archive to read this blog before proceeding so you will understand the basic steps of Focusing and prepared to do the practice exercise below.

It may help to view the Six Steps of Focusing just like any “recipe” that you try to follow — in baking a cake, learning to hit a tennis ball, turning on a complicated piece of machinery. Each Step is a specific activity that you do, like “break open the eggs, then separate the whites from the yolks” or “First, pump up the oil, then set the choke, then turn on the ignition.”

You have to know how to do each action before you can carry out the recipe and get to the goal. After you have done the recipe a lot of times, you can go very smoothly and even make your own intuitive adjustments.

But we are not used to “inner actions,” knowing lots of different activities we can carry on inside. So, in learning Focusing, you are learning a set of actions to take inside of yourself:

(1) Clearing A Space: Using a relaxation technique, a guided fantasy, or a formal Taking an Inventory exercise to go from the intellectualization and tension of the day into a more peaceful contact with your body and its wisdom

(2) Getting A Felt Sense: Now, having set aside everything you already know, you ask an Open-Ended Question, like “How am I today?” or “What am I carrying?” , or, if you have chosen a specific issue to work on, “What is this all about?”, AND THEN YOU PAUSE AND WAIT, FOR AS LONG AS A MINUTE, FOR THE VAGUE, PREVERBAL, SUBTLE “BODILY FELT SENSE” OR “INTUITIVE FEEL” OF AN ISSUE OR IDEA TO ARISE.

This “pausing” and paying attention for the preverbal “feel” is a totally new Inner Activity, one that anyone hardly ever does until they learn Intuitive Focusing, and the actual way to access The Creative Edge, the “bodily feel” that is the wellspring of the “new.”

(3) Finding A Handle: In this Inner Activity, you look for words or an image or a gesture that begins to capture the “quality” (“jumpy,” “black,” “a concrete block,” “sad,” “all knotted up,” “joyful,”) of the”felt sense.”

(4) Resonating And Checking: And, in order to find the exactly right symbolizations to capture this new Creative Edge, you have to GO BACK-AND-FORTH BETWEEN ANY SYMBOLS AND THE “INTUITIVE FEEL” UNTIL YOU FIND THE SYMBOLS THAT ARE “EXACTLY RIGHT,” EXPERIENCED AS A PHYSICAL RELEASE OF TENSION, A LARGE OR SMALL “AHAH! THAT IS IT EXACTLY, FROM YOUR BODY.

(4) Asking: Asking open-ended questions of the “intuitive feel” (“And what is so hard about that?” or “And why is this so important to me?” or “And what is the crux of that anger?” and, again, doing the Inner Actions of Steps 2, 3, and 4 :Pausing to get a Felt Sense, looking for Handle words or images, and Resonating and Checking until the body says, through tension release, “Yes, that is exactly it.” The open-ended question allows a new “felt sense” to form in response, during the pause, and further unfolding happens through resonating and checking.

Inner Actions repeated over and over: Asking, PAUSING, looking for Symbolizations, Checking and Resonating whatever comes until the body says “Yes! That is it.”

(5) Receiving: after a “felt shift,” a step of unfolding or “Ahah!,” stopping just for a moment and letting the new realization “sink in.” Pausing to let the new information get “lived into” by your body, taking it in at a cellular level. And appreciating your body, so often ignored and turned away from during the usual day, for sharing its wisdom with you.

And, then, if you like, you can start another cycle of the Inner Actions of Focusing, looking for further unfolding on the issue or idea: Asking, Pausing for Felt Sense, Looking for Handle symbols, Resonating and Checking until the body-sense says, “Yes, that is exactly right.”

You can try out Intuitive Focusing and receive a Listening Response by joining The Creative Edge Practice e-group here.

INSTANT “AHAH!” # 1 Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You

Focusing On the Creative Edge

And here, again, is your practice exercise. Please take time to walk through the Complete Focusing Session in this blog.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

 See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Comments (2)

By Kathy McGuire, September 22, 2008 11:42 am

Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)

Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual

“Ajas” Instantaneos

Some people find it easy to drop all their stress and enter into an interior Focusing space. But, many people need easy first steps of practice for “going quietly inside.” And even experienced Focusers get caught up in stress and business and welcome a reminder to take a moment to….pause…..(sigh!)…pay attention to their breathing…….(ahhhhhh!)……and…relax…

While many people use meditation techniques as an end in themselves, a way of healing mind and body, we are using them as a way of “clearing a space” in the body for the specific problem-solving process of Intuitive Focusing.

FREE MEDITATION EXPLANATIONS AND PRACTICE ON THE WEB!

Just “Google” “meditation techniques” and a number of excellent websites offering free explanations and practice exercises will pop up. In general, meditation is a way of escaping from and stilling the endless “go-around” of our thoughts and worries, the endless activity of “the monkey mind.” Our Noticing Your Breathing exercise, as a form of “clearing a space” for Focusing, is similar to this breathing process described at the free Meditation Handbook website, which explains seven basic approaches:

“Another useful method is to lend special awareness to the breathing process felt in the belly. Just behind and below your navel (belly button) lies the hara, which is felt as an ethereal ball of energy. The hara is a natural balancing point of your consciousness which can be thought of as the center of your being. Subjectively and poetically speaking, the hara is where man and universe meet. It is the gateway where we merge and become man-universe and universe-man. No one really knows what the hara actually is, but we can use it to our full advantage. Consciously developing a powerful hara center is the most important secret of meditation.

When your consciousness is centered in the hara instead of the head, your thinking process slows down and you can relax in the expanded world of being. Trying to stop distracting thoughts through will power alone leads to more thoughts and a self-defeating inner struggle. By transferring your center of awareness to the hara, thoughts gradually disappear on their own without inner conflict. That is why you see Buddha statues with a big belly. It is an esoteric message that the hara is the key to meditation.

Sit quietly and focus on your belly as it moves in and out as you breathe. Over time the hara point will become more noticeable as your meditation grows stronger. Sudden emergencies, such as near collisions on the highway, tend to activate the hara center. We often get a “gut reaction” from sudden danger. You can nourish the feeling of the hara by simply paying passive attention to it. This relaxed concentration is very close to doing nothing, yet it is still a subtle effort. Drinking herb tea or hot water before meditation sessions relaxes the gut and facilitates awareness of the hara. Overeating and consuming cold drinks tends to make hara awareness more difficult.”

The bolding is mine, showing how this meditation practice is seen as strengthening your ability to notice “gut feelings,” “intuitions,” a great companion to Intuitive Focusing.

If you are really intrigued, you can go to Free Meditations website and find several different versions of a Buddhist breath meditation and many, many more meditation techniques.

And, last but not least, at The Meditation Society website, you can find links to 108 different meditations on the web!

But we are using meditation as a first step, a way of opening up enough “free attention” in the body for the deeper process of Intuitive Focusing, which involves a more active back-and-forth between the “intuitive feel” of an issue or idea and symbolizations (words, images, gestures) that arise from it.

Print and Practice!!!!!

Here is your relaxation exercise for this month. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible.

If you order our Self-Help Package, , you can listen on audio CD Intuitive Focusing: Disk one, Track 2, with Dr, McGuire’s peaceful voice to keep you company — and help you stay on track!!

PRE-FOCUSING PRACTICE
A. RELAXATION SUGGESTIONS (from Complete Focusing Instructions, which you can download from the link at the top of this blog)

The quiet time between instructions is an important time for just breathing—and relaxing.

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

1. Noticing-Allow 10-15 minutes

Lie down and make yourself comfortable—Loosen any clothing that is too tight—
Massage your own neck and face, making small circles with your fingertips over small areas at a time—Find at least five different spots on your neck and five on your face to massage in this way— Feel the tension leaving—
1 minute
Stretch your whole body three times, reaching your arms out over your head, arching your back, and pointing your toes— After each stretch, collapse into the floor and breath deeply, relaxing—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax
10 seconds
Now, lie there and notice your breathing. Don’t try to change it,just notice the breath going in and out—in—and out—in—and out—in—and out
10 seconds
Now, begin to notice any thoughts or pictures you are having. JUST NOTICE THEM—and keep breathing, in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just notice your thoughts going by, like a movie—don’t think or problem solve—just notice—and keep breathing, in—and out—in and out—
1 minute
If you realize that you have started thinking about something and are trying to solve a problem or have started worrying about something, just allow yourself to leave that thought and to come back to noticing your breathing, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
If you have started thinking and problem solving, just leave that thought—and come back to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just noticing your thoughts, like a movie, letting them go, returning to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out
3 minutes
Now, massage any parts of your body that seem tense or uncomfortable—
1 minute
Stretch one more time, and get up when you are ready.

Free Resources

Want to share your experience, do Focusing online and get an actual Listening Response, ask questions? Join The Creative Edge Practive yahoo e-support group.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

 See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Comments (0)

By Kathy McGuire, September 19, 2008 11:49 am

Download   Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages) 

In the First Week of this four weeks practice of Instant “Ahah!” #1: FOCUSING — Find Out What Is Bothering You, I introduced Gendlin’s Six Step Focusing Process and gave the Complete Focusing Exercise. If you are just joining us, go to blog Complete Focusing Session before proceeding so you will understand the basic steps of Focusing and prepared to do the practice exercise below.

In my personal/work life, I am caught up in a situation generating a lot of anxiety. I often use the Relaxation: Noticing Your Breathing exercise to help break through the wall of anxiety so that I can fall asleep or, at other times, to “Clear A Space” for a deeper Focusing Turn.

I also sometimes add the basic energy meridian tapping sequence from Emotional Freedom Techniques (www.emofree.com  ), another free self-help method which often allows the deep sighs and tension release of the relaxation response.

And, really most successfully, I turn to The Creative Edge Practice E-Group — just knowing there are Listeners out there in cyberspace usually allows me to shift immediately from overwhelming anxiety to relieving tears, even sobbing, about the deeper fears and issues underlying the anxiety. As actual research with brain waves and galvanic skin response (GSR) has shown, simply using Focusing to find a “name,” to find words and images for what the body is carrying subconsciously, actually brings about relaxation. It is better to know what you are facing, even if the words seem bad to others!

Here is a recent example of a Focusing Turn on “Debilitating Anxiety” which I did on The Creative Edge Practice E-Group, getting a lot of “felt shifting” and release of my anxiety (and the ability to sleep for two nights after the Turn) as well as, in a few hours, several comforting, empathic Listening Responses from group members throughout the world. I include only a small part of the Turn, demonstrating the initial shift from “free-floating anxiety” to relieving tears and sobbing as words come as a “Handle” on the felt sense:

Hello, Group,

I am suffering from “debilitating anxiety,” frozen neck and shoulders and jaw, sleeplessness or restless sleeping. I am reaching out to your friendly comfort in hopes of “touching” the edge of this anxiety, and allowing it to unfold its message. I find anxiety especially difficult to “disidentify from”, when trying to do Focusing alone, so I reach for your compassion — just knowing you are out there usually helps!

So,  I am stopping to “sense in,” to try to stand at the edge of this anxiety, instead of being paralyzed inside of it — I imagine I will do some Clearing A Space, naming the various issues I am carrying, seeing which wants attention — or perhaps not! We’ll see what happens in this non-linear Focusing process! But, first, just turning toward my body with some noticing of my breathing as a way to come into my body, and with the general Focusing question, “What is this ‘anxiety’ all about?” —

(eyes closed, sigh, breathing—) Words come up almost immediately, with tears (and the words completely surprise me!): “I feel so alone. I am so lonely.” (sobbing comes, as I ask myself, “What is this lonely?” and wait for the fuller “felt sense” of “it all” to come —so I am asking, “What is this sobbing about lonely, and related somehow to anxiety? (still surprised at the words) (more sobbing, don’t know “why”) —anxiety is somehow related to “feeling so lonely” — “What is ‘all of this’?” and Focusing on the “feel of it all” —

Some thinking comes: “Perhaps it is the sense of ‘battle’ involved in a lot of work and family things on my plate — the “uphill struggle” so commonly created around herself by an 8 on the Enneagram: The Challenger — hostility all around — so, I will stop and do Focusing, sensing into what comes in the ‘center of my body’ in response to this ‘guess’ —

(deep breath, quiet pause for inner ‘reflection’) —(shoulders go up and down in spasm of “fear” — so I decided to “accentuate,” to repeat this body motion, see if something comes as a “felt sense,” larger “feel” of “all of that fear in my shoulders) — (lots of sobbing comes as I repeat this “spasm of fear” and the words, again, “I feel so alone; I am so alone” (“What is this ‘alone’?, I ask myself. These words still surprise me) —

(long pause for Focusing on the “feel of it all”)— Words: “It seems, or perhaps, it is that I am seeing negative possibilities in areas where other people don’t want to think about them or hear about them, and this leaves me alone with my fears, perhaps” — knowing this is just a “guess,” again, I will stop and “resonate” these words against the “bodily felt sense” that is MORE than any of these words — “Is it that?”, I ask, and wait quietly, reflecting inward, and see what comes —–

(big sigh, breath, and another) — (moving my head back and forth on my neck rapidly, trying to break through this tension) —(big breath) — (shoulders spasming again) —

“And isn’t this what I always do, catastrophize, intuit the worst that can happen — and sometimes I am right, sometimes wrong (and these new words come) — but always I am prepared! I am prepared for the worst! Prepared for the battle, the disillusionment, the failure —- (big sigh)

This is just the beginning, but you can see how quickly the even distant presence of Listening Others helped me to “relate to” the anxiety, instead of being frozen inside it, and allowed new steps of forward motion, of intuitive problem solving to arise.

You can explore joining The Creative Edge Practice e-group here.

INSTANT “AHAH!” # 1 Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You

Focusing On the Creative Edge

And here, again, is your practice exercise. Please take time to walk through the Complete Focusing Session as I did in the example above. You will find it in this blog, along with the opportunity to download the Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual in English or Spanish.

Free Resources

Want to share your experience, do Focusing online and get an actual Listening Response, ask questions? Join The Creative Edge Practive yahoo e-support group.

Tell me what you think at cefocusing@gmail.com or comment on this blog below !

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

 See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Comments (1)

By Kathy McGuire, September 18, 2008 1:45 pm

 Download  Complete Focusing Instructions Manual (17 pages)    

GETTING A “FELT SENSE,” AN “INTUITIVE FEEL”

Gendlin’s Focusing (Bantam, 1981, 1984), and my Intuitive Focusing, is a procedure for going back-and-forth between the bodily-feel of an issue or idea or creative project and words/images/gestures until symbolizations are found which are “just right” in capturing this “intuitive feel” of “the whole thing. In this series of blogs, I am teaching you the six steps of the Focusing process (see blog Complete Focusing Session for a sample Focusing Session).

In the first Step of Focusing, you “Clear A Space” with relaxation or other exercises, setting aside already-known intellectualizations and coming in touch with your body. See Relaxation #1 Noticing for a sample relaxation exercise.

In the second Step of Focusing, Getting A Felt Sense, you wait quietly, for as much as a minute, for a subtle “feel” of the whole thing, an “intuition,” to form in the center of your body. Then, you create words or images that are just right to capture it. You are looking for the “intuitive feel,” the Creative Edge, the right-brain information that is more than you can put into words. Gendlin (Focusing, Bantam, 1981, 1984) calls it “the felt sense” of the whole thing.

In this Pre-Focusing Practice exercise, I try to give you guided imagery that will evoke some strong, hard-to-miss bodily “felt senses.”

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

1. The “Intuitive Feel” of Each Person-Allow 10 minutes
(Joan Klagsbrun invented this exercise)

I’m going to invite you to imagine two doors. Behind the first will be someone that you feel good about. Behind the second will be someone who upsets you.

You will notice that you have a different experience of each person in the center of your body, around the chest and heart area. This experience, this “intuitive feel” without words, is the Creative Edge.

Although initially this experience comes as an “intuition,” or a “feeling,” without words, by paying attention to this “intuitive feel,” you can create many new words and images, truly innovative ideas.

—Close your eyes and get comfortable—loosen any clothing that is too tight—
1 minute
—Just follow your breathing for a little while, noticing the breath going in—and out—
1 minute
—Now take a few moments to think about who the two people will be, one that you feel good about, one who upsets you.
1 minute
—And think about the kind of door you’ll put each behind, the decorations, color — 30 seconds

—Now, imagine yourself walking up to the first door and opening it—Here is the person that you feel good about—10 seconds

—Let yourself notice the “feel” of that person in your body—10 seconds

—Find some words or an image to describe it—30 seconds

—Next, bid that person “Goodbye,” close the door, and walk away—10 seconds

—Now, imagine yourself walking up to the other door and opening it—Here is the person who upsets you—10 seconds

—Again, notice the “experience” of that person in the center of your body, the “intuitive feel—10 seconds

—Find some words or an image to describe it—30 seconds

—Next, bid that person “Goodbye,” close the door, and walk away—10 seconds

—Now, spend a few moments comparing the two “felt senses,” the good feelings and the uncomfortable feelings — 30 seconds

—These are the “bodily felt senses,” the “intuitive feel” you have, of the two people involved. They are more than you could ever put into words, but you can make many words and images from them—30 seconds

— Spend as long as you wish exploring these two experiences, going back and forth between the two “intuitive feels” and looking for words or images to describe the difference—
3 minutes
—And when you are ready, slowly bring your attention back into the room.

DOWNLOAD COMPLETE FOCUSING INSTRUCTIONS MANUAL FROM LINK AT TOP OF THIS BLOG

Remember, it can be much easier to learn Intuitive Focusing in the company of a Focused Listener. You can learn all about Focusing Listening, and find resources, at the website for Creative Edge Focusing (TM), www.cefocusing.com . And you will find additional Complete Focusing Instructions, for personal growth, creativity, and spirituality, in the Instant “Ahah!”s Mini-Manual, available along with newsletter subscription.

If you subscribe to our e-newsletter, you will receive three exercises a week by email to help you learn and practice Listening and Focusing at home and work.

Click here to subscribe to our Instant “Ahah!” e-newsletter and get the latest exercises first!!!

Click here for a free Intuitive Focusing Mini-E-course

 See Core Concept: Conflict Resolution to find a complete mini-course on Interpersonal Focusing and Conflict Resolution, including Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, Blanchard’s “One Minute Apology,” Patricia Evan’s books on Verbally Abuse and Controlling Relationships, McMahon’s Beyond The Myth Of Dominance, and much more.

See Core Concept: Intimate Relationship to find a complete mini-course on increasing intimacy and sexuality, including the “Sharing Your Day” exercise, Listening/Focusing Partnerships for The Way of Relationship, untangling and equalizing desire, tantric sexuality, and much more.

Download complete Instant “Ahah!” Mini-Manual, in English and Spanish, from CEF Website, or download from links at top of this blog.

Find links to free articles, personality tests, multi-media Self-Help training, Classes and workshops

Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

Creative Edge Focusing (TM)

www.cefocusing.com

Comments (2)

By Kathy McGuire, September 6, 2008 1:58 pm

From Creative Edge Focusing: This week’s Relaxation Exercise

Some people find it easy to drop all their stress and enter into an interior Focusing space. But, many people need easy first steps of practice for “going quietly inside.” And even experienced Focusers get caught up in stress and business and welcome a reminder to take a moment to….pause…..(sigh!)…pay attention to their breathing…….(ahhhhhh!)……and…relax…

Print and Practice!!!!!

Here is your relaxation exercise for this week, which we will actually practice for four weeks until it becomes natural to you. Print it out, keep it handy, and take those few moments to relax every day, if you can, or as often as possible. Relaxing is one way to “clear a space” inside for a longer-term Focusing Problem Solving session (see blog  Focusing: Find Out What Is Bothering You  for a complete introduction to Focusing) .

You will also find this in the Complete Focusing Instructions download at Creative Edge Focusing, p.3: Pre-Focusing Practice A. Relaxation Suggestions #1: Noticing. You get it by joining our e-support group for further support in practicing Listening and Focusing.

And, if you order our Self-Help Package, you can listen on audio CD Intuitive Focusing: Disk one, Track 2, with Dr, McGuire’s peaceful voice to keep you company — and help you stay on track!!

PRE-FOCUSING PRACTICE

A. RELAXATION SUGGESTIONS (from Complete Focusing Instructions)

Use a gentle, slowly-paced voice, leaving time as suggested between parts of the instruction (time those 1 minute pauses — they are way longer than you can imagine!). The quiet time between instructions is an important time for just breathing—and relaxing.

You can lie on the floor or, for most exercises, sit in a chair. If you fall asleep, it’s okay! Means you need more rest! But you may also want to practice sitting up to avoid sleeping.

Especially at the beginning, time those “1 minute” pauses for breathing in—and out— You will be amazed at how long a minute is, how seldom we ever pause for a whole minute!!!

I turn to this simple relaxation exercise when I am having trouble sleeping or am otherwise overwhelmed with stress, anxiety, tension. It is a great first step to a more lengthy Complete Focusing session.

1. Noticing-Allow 10-15 minutes

Lie down and make yourself comfortable—Loosen any clothing that is too tight—
Massage your own neck and face, making small circles with your fingertips over small areas at a time—Find at least five different spots on your neck and five on your face to massage in this way— Feel the tension leaving—
1 minute
Stretch your whole body three times, reaching your arms out over your head, arching your back, and pointing your toes— After each stretch, collapse into the floor and breath deeply, relaxing—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax—stretch—and relax
10 seconds
Now, lie there and notice your breathing. Don’t try to change it,just notice the breath going in and out—in—and out—in—and out—in—and out
10 seconds
Now, begin to notice any thoughts or pictures you are having. JUST NOTICE THEM—and keep breathing, in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just notice your thoughts going by, like a movie—don’t think or problem solve—just notice—and keep breathing, in—and out—in and out—
1 minute
If you realize that you have started thinking about something and are trying to solve a problem or have started worrying about something, just allow yourself to leave that thought and to come back to noticing your breathing, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
If you have started thinking and problem solving, just leave that thought—and come back to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out—
1 minute
Just noticing your thoughts, like a movie, letting them go, returning to noticing your breath, going in—and out—in—and out
3 minutes
Now, massage any parts of your body that seem tense or uncomfortable—
1 minute
Stretch one more time, and get up when you are ready.

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Dr. Kathy McGuire, Director

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